Liquid LibraryI am done looking. I have found the one. I just know this person is who I want to be with for the rest of my life.
Now if my 12-year-old cousin said this to me I’d think, “Man, the good ol’ days of being young and oblivious.” And I’d laugh it off, waiting for her to find a new boy on the playground to chase.
But when my 45-year-old dad, on the other hand, said this to me about my now-stepmom, I was completely thrilled for him, my heart warmed at the thought of him settling down.
From my little cousin to my old pops, is it really fair to judge the legitimacy of their love based on how many birthday candles they’ve blown out? Is it fair to assume that having more years of experience makes your love with someone stronger?
I don’t think so.
I’m no expert, but I do know every word from the movie “Love Actually,” and prior to this article I read many online discussion boards asking whether age matters in relationships. I’ve come to my own conclusion: There is no age limit to fall in love. We come into this world with pumping hearts, who’s to tell us when we can start using them?
Now, I find myself contemplating age and all of the roles it plays in relationships. There are questions about an age gap between the two people in the relationship. From my own experience 8212; meaning an array of immature boyfriends both younger and older than I 8212; and reading some online articles, I have collected enough data to declare that it’s not important.
Yes, at first glance we thought Anna Nicole Smith and J. Howard Marshall II (63 years her senior) were an odd pair; but, I think in the end, we all accepted their unique romance and saw the spark in her eye. Right?
Consider Bill and Hillary Clinton, they are only one year apart and look how great that marriage has proved to be. See, when it comes to real love, age gaps 8212; big and little 8212; can’t get in the way.
OK, besides my bitter sarcasm about celebrity marriages, I have yet to hear someone say that a relationship can’t work because of age difference. There are far more important things to consider. Let’s start with compatibility of personalities, hobbies, goals or maturity level.
This isn’t breaking news I know, but somehow age does still find its way into relationship problems. My opinion is that it becomes an issue when we start listening to outsiders.
We judge young girls with, “He’s how much older than you?”
We make jokes, “Cradle-robber.”
We make rules for ourselves and limit our options, “He’s a great guy, but I couldn’t date anyone younger than me.”
We question optimistic youth, “Aren’t you two a little young to be rushing into marriage?”
We can all say, “Don’t listen to them. I know how I feel. I know my intentions and I know that we have something special.” But is it ever that easy?
I don’t think age is such an important issue, instead, the stage of life you are in is what should be considered. Some 19-year-olds are ready for marriage and ready to settle down. Some 30-year-olds are out in clubs, playing the field. Society has given us time lines telling us what we should be doing at what age, but I think it’s important to realize everyone grows in their own time and everyone has different values and goals.
I guess I’ve seen enough examples in my own family to lead me to believe that we can’t plan love.
I used to want to get married and start a family young 8212; be a hip, cool mom. Then I wanted to wait 10 years, make lots of money and then have kids 8212; have a stable income and be a wise, experienced mom. Where do I come up with this stuff, thinking that I can plan it all out?
I know couples who married months after high school and 30 years later are still going strong. I know couples who didn’t meet until their 40s and are now finally experiencing the rush of true love.
I know that you Daily Aztec readers aren’t stupid, so I trust you to keep in mind the important things in a relationship.
Key factors such as compatibility, values and goals. Do they make you smile? Do they make you feel special? Do they give you butterflies? It’s essential to know what’s important to you and not to forget those things.
One thing’s clear to me now: Aaliyah said it right, “Age ain’t nothing but a number.”
8212;Kristina Peltin is an interdisciplinary studies sophomore.
8212;This column does not necessarily reflect the opinion of The Daily Aztec.
