There I was, finally getting a chance to exhale from the seismic ramifications of the midterm elections and all set to have a carefree Thanksgiving with my family. But guess what happens? My life was hijacked by a VH1 “I Love The ’90s” episode from hell.
First, I discovered that my friends at the Fox network were preparing to air a television special starring O.J. Simpson. On the program, titled “If I Did It,” Simpson was going to plug his book of the same name and graphically describe how, hypothetically, he would’ve murdered his ex-wife, Nicole Brown Simpson, and her friend, Ron Goldman, if he had been inclined to do such a heinous act. Which, to be clear, he wasn’t.
Am I the only one who thinks the whole farce that we’ve had to endure with “The Juice” during the past dozen years could’ve been easily avoided if his defense team just went with the insanity plea? His kitchen drawer is missing a few knives, if you catch my drift.
Under normal circumstances, I would’ve been more incensed by this story, but because it was coming from the Fox network, all I could do was sigh. Besides, in the end, the network decided not to run it – bowing to pressure from its affiliates.
“I and senior management agree with the American public that this was an ill-considered project,” said Rupert Murdoch, News Corp. chairman, according to The Associated Press.
Fox didn’t come to this conclusion until both the Brown and Goldman families made their grievances known about the O.J. special.
By the way, there’s no truth to the rumor that Fox will replace the newly open slot in their programming schedule with a Mel Gibson documentary called “If the Holocaust Happened.”
My nightmarish time warp to the ’90s was just beginning, though. The next day, a friend sent me a YouTube clip of Michael Richards, better known as Kramer of the epic television series, “Seinfeld,” performing a stand-up routine at the now ironically named Laugh Factory comedy club in Los Angeles. Apparently, Richards got heckled by some black audience members and lost his cool to such a degree that he yelled several extremely outrageous, racially insensitive comments at them, including at least seven uses of the “n-word.” Even after hearing about the story and reading the transcript ahead of time, watching the clip was still shocking and uncomfortable.
I don’t think I’ll ever be able to watch a “Seinfeld” rerun without thinking of Richards – by extension, Kramer – flipping out and disgracing himself. He’s basically ruined the show for me. I would be stunned if he ever found work in Hollywood again.
Finally, my blast at the past seeped itself into the world of sports. As a fan of the woebegone Philadelphia Eagles, I had plenty of fall Sundays during the ’90s ruined by ex-Dallas Cowboy wide receiver Michael Irvin. Still, now that he had retired and moved on to broadcasting, I was growing to appreciate Irvin’s openness and sense of humor as an analyst, especially because most ex-jocks usually sound so milquetoast on air. Then he went on the Dan Patrick radio show on Nov. 20 and ruined everything.
Irvin, while speaking about the athleticism of Tony Romo, the new hotshot quarterback of the Cowboys, speculated that Romo, who is white, must have had some black ancestor somewhere in his lineage to account for his physical prowess.
“He doesn’t look like he’s that type of an athlete,” Irvin said of Romo. “But he is. He is, man. I don’t know if some brother down in that line somewhere, I don’t know who saw what or where, his great-great-great-great-grandma ran over in the ‘hood or something went down.”
Even if Irvin was joking, I don’t believe he should be allowed to simply apologize and keep his job at ESPN. This was a patently offensive, insensitive and racist comment. I’m old enough to remember watching former-CBS analyst Jimmy “The Greek” Snyder back in 1988 when he tried to explain on a nationally televised pregame show that blacks are superior athletes to whites because of selective breeding during the era of slavery. He got fired immediately for those comments, and rightly so. Irvin shouldn’t get any different treatment.
If only these creeps who already had the whole past decade to themselves in the media spotlight could’ve gracefully drifted away to obscurity. But no, the ’90s weren’t enough. They just had to be newsworthy all over again by making complete fools of themselves in front of every camera and microphone they came across. You just know that, right now, some TV executive is pitching a reality show with these guys as housemates. I wonder what network it’ll be on.
-Michael Erler is a political science senior.
-This column does not necessarily reflect the opinion of The Daily Aztec. Send e-mail to letters@thedailyaztec.com. Anonymous letters will not be printed – include your full name, major and year in school.
