It might just be me, but watching a nine-month pregnant M.I.A. who was doing more wobbling than swaggerin’ around stage, accompanied by the “rap pack,” isn’t exactly the way I wanted to spend a rainy Sunday night. Some may argue that Kanye West’s new greasy “I am more famous than Elvis” fro stole the attention 8212; but I still blame that hideous polka-dot unitard that was M.I.A.’s black and white bumblebee-esque ensemble.

The Grammys are to the Oscars as what the Clippers are to the Lakers 8212; same class award ceremony, just not the same 8212; and to be honest, it perfectly lived up to that analogy two nights ago. I had hoped the Grammys would be a much more classy event than the MTV Video Music Awards, which pretty much just consist of Britney Spears wrapping herself in a more unique mammal each year 8212; unfortunately, the ceremony failed like it was being tested for steroids in 2003.

If you were lucky enough to be nowhere near a TV on Sunday night, then let me recap the ceremony like Stuart Scott’s lazy eye.

Jonas Brothers and Stevie Wonder
Have you ever mixed Grand Marnier with a Yoo-hoo? Neither have I. That’s why I can’t understand why someone on the planning committee for the Grammys would take cartoon characters from a Disney movie (the Jonas Brothers), and pair them up with a legendary artist such as Stevie Wonder.

First of all, you can’t even tell which Jonas Brother is the oldest 8212; you just know the middle one always wears something shiny. And second, why would Stevie Wonder even accept such an invitation?

Lil Wayne
Let it be heard that I have always been a fan of Weezy, but why does he always have to look like such a crack-fiend? His scarf was nine sizes longer than his dreads, and his voice, when singing into a microphone, doesn’t even have the same amount of “weez” in it.

Chris Brown’s disappearance
Apparently Chris Brown couldn’t “smoke on these cigarettes no more” because whatever it was that was bothering him was a little too much to take. Brown’s much-anticipated performance was unfortunately cut short after he allegedly assaulted his girlfriend Rihanna in Los Angeles on Saturday night.

So, to think that the drama of the event wasn’t already at an all-time high would be a complete underestimation.

Besides Coldplay looking like they were individual crayons out of a Crayola box, the night did end up being a colorful and memorable event 8212; as it was intended to be. Plus, Daft Punk won best Dance / Electronic Album of the Year, and you know somewhere on our campus, 30 girls in bright neon American Apparel dresses jumped for joy.

8212;Faryar Borhani is a journalism junior.

8212;This column does not necessarily reflect the opinion of The Daily Aztec.