Many of us are destined to suffer the agony of an awkward date. If you’re like me, you’ve had several. Despite what they (whoever “they” are) say about things getting better throughout time, I can assure you dealing with an awkward date does not. Awkward dates now and forever will be, well, awkward.

I know this from firsthand experience as well as from the testimony of many adolescents, young and middle-aged adults and even from seasoned Nanas and grandpappies. My grandma’s friend Lucy was just regaling me the other week about the time she went on a date with a man who played with his set of fake teeth the whole time.

They were sitting in a Red Lobster, bibbed and sipping soup. The waiter brought out the lobster legs but left the biscuits. Lucy was too shy to make the first move for the food, so she grabbed a lobster leg cracker, twirled it in her hand and waited. A moment later, her date seized a thick and juicy piece of lobster leg, removed his false teeth, said something about trust and began cracking the lobster legs with his dentures. Poor Lucy was horrified.

I also know from the testimony of toddlers. I’ve babysat and chaperoned many an awkward baby date.

One time, I was watching my friend’s kid play in the sandbox with her little boyfriend. He had a denim jacket and was almost potty-trained. In strolls a doe-eyed girl carrying a state of the art pail and shovel. She had a red bow on her head, eyelashes for days and was fully potty-trained. My friend’s kid never had a chance. I could tell the little boy felt awkward leaving his date for the girl with the pail and shovel, but it happened. Kids can be ruthless.

Now that I’m older, my awkward threshold still hasn’t subsided, but I’ve gained a little more perspective. We’re supposed to go on awkward dates. It makes life just a little bit more hilarious.

So the next time you’re watching a really bad movie with a hot guy or girl, you’re holding hands and a pool of sweat is accumulating between you and your date’s palms because you both feel too awkward to let go, remember it’s only awkward for you so it can be hilarious to everyone else.