Flustered Fashionista: My boyfriend is starting to nag me about how I dress. He gets annoyed or jealous when I wear short shorts or crop tops, but it’s summer for crying out loud. I want to dress up and go out with friends but I don’t want him to be upset with me. I care about his feelings, but I also want to enjoy myself in college. Love Guru, what should I do?
Love Guru: It sounds as if your boyfriend is either protective or has some trust issues. If he is being reasonable, take what he is saying into consideration. However, sometimes guys don’t understand female fashion trends. Assure him you just enjoy dressing up with your girlfriends and aren’t out to flirt with other guys. Unless you are frequenting lingerie parties, he should be understanding if he wants to make things work. Try not to flaunt your skimpier outfits on Facebook or Instagram because it makes you seem like you’re looking for attention. Finally, have a serious talk with your beau to try and resolve any insecurities he may have.
Good luck!
Freshman Blues: My boyfriend and I live in the same residence hall and share a few classes. We spend all of our time together. My friends are always annoyed with me, and my grades are suffering. How do I find a balance
with everything?
Love Guru: Dedicating the majority of your time to a relationship will only cause you harm. Spending time with your friends and making time to study are important aspects of your life, too. To start, make plans with your friends. Put the phone down and don’t text your boyfriend for an entire night. The cliche “absence makes the heart grow fonder” has some truth to it. Do not become the couple that cannot exist without each other’s presence. It’s important to have your own life, too. If having class with your boyfriend is distracting, try sitting somewhere other than next to him, so you can focus on taking notes instead of passing notes to each other during a lecture. A relationship should complement every part of your life, not be detrimental to it. Spending too much time with your beau might cause you two to argue or grow tired of each other. In order to maintain a healthy relationship, all other aspects of your life must be healthy, too. Give yourself some “me” time—treat yourself to a coffee break or hit the gym alone. Don’t let a relationship control your life; you should always come first.
Twenty-Fun: I’ll be turning 21 soon, which is obviously very exciting. The only thing is, my boyfriend is 19. I’m worried this age difference will make things difficult for us. What should
I do?
Love Guru: While this situation seems daunting at first glance, it’s actually simpler to overcome than you might think. You’re going to be enthralled by what the clubbing and bar scenes have to offer—fruity drinks, loud music, dancing and social interaction. I recommend staying with your beau until you’ve gone out a few times. If you feel as though you need him with you to have a good time, you can do one of two things. Your first option is to stop going out to 21-and-up establishments. Your second? Break it off with your boyfriend. This may seem brash, but the fact is, if there’s any tension between you two because you’re going out and he isn’t, the relationship probably won’t last. There’s a high chance that jealousy and trust issues will arise because of your bar-going adventures. The most important thing to remember is to not take it personally, these situations happen every day. At the end of the day, you know what’s best for you, so no matter what choice you make, decide it with confidence and everything will work itself out.