Ladies and gentlemen, I have hit the wall.

And no, I am not talking about Pink Floyd or the result of my incessant texting behind the wheel.

Usually, I don’t mind walls. I brightened up my apartment by painting it Tiffany blue; they keep my feelings inside and weirdos out. But this wall? It’s deadly. It’s crippling. It’s absolutely life-ruining.

I’m talking about the school-related “I do not care anymore, at all, whatsoever, not even a little bit” wall I hit every semester.

Ideally, this wall would materialize closer to the end of the semester. Hell, I’d even take it toward the middle of the semester.

Unfortunately for me, this one comes just as timely as bad hair on picture day or technical malfunctions on my TiVo. But here I am, mere weeks into the semester and I’m completely checked out.

I wake up in the morning and my first thought isn’t anything about seizing the day or looking outside and singing along with the obnoxious chirping going on outside my balcony door. Instead it is, “Oh my god, I can’t wait to go back to sleep tonight.”

Then I go through the laundry list of things I have to get done before I can curl back up into my bed like the nocturnal creature I am. The first day of school, I was up half an hour before my alarm went off, but now I’m out of bed five minutes after I’ve hit the snooze button for the fourth time and I am, literally, dragging my body to make myself somewhat presentable.

And that’s another thing. The first few weeks of school I was all about looking like my fabulous self. Walking onto campus, I wanted everyone to see how cute and obnoxiously sparkly my wardrobe was. Now? I couldn’t care less if my hair is done, if I’m wearing makeup or if I’m even dressed appropriately for the weather And just for the record, flip-flops are acceptable for any season. We live in Southern California, deal with it.

My shabby appearance isn’t even the half of it. My procrastination is out of control. Completing assignments any length of time more than 12 hours before they are due has become a total anomaly.

I ditch classes when I don’t feel like going and I’ve already gone from a level three to a level 12 Facebook stalker, which is not surprising considering the fact Facebook stalking is all I do during class now.

Why can’t professors institute some sort of seventh inning stretch for the semester? I know the seventh inning stretch doesn’t come until what is pretty much the end of the game, but seriously, I can’t be the only one who feels this way. How about some sort of mid-semester, just-because break? You know, just to get the juices flowing.

Sitting here complaining isn’t going to make it move any faster. I realize the situation I’m currently in is going to seem completely ideal once midterms come along. But how am I supposed to last until then if my wick is already burnt almost all the way down? How can I cope? How can I deal?

I’ve begun compiling a list of ways to get around this wall. Number one: Stop staying up so late. Going to bed at 1 a.m. could explain, perhaps, 98 percent of why you always have lids the weight of Acme anvils during your first two classes. Number two: Eat breakfast. I’ve been hearing this is the most important meal of the day for years, but there really is some truth to it. Grab a Jamba Juice or go through Starbucks and get one of those deliciously overpriced breakfast sandwiches (there are approximately 100 Starbucks locations on campus, you have no excuse). Having a little nosh in the morning is a great way to help remove those heavy lids. Number three: Take out that clock radio you have buried deep in the underbelly of your junk-filled closet and tune it so your favorite station wakes you up. You might get an Ovation Hair therapy commercial, but your chances of catching a good song are worth the risk. Have you ever had Brandon Boyd’s sexy voice serenade you awake with “Wish You Were Here”? It’s impossible to have a bad day after that. And finally, number four: Brush your damn hair, put on some makeup, throw on some cute shoes and strut out the door because when you look good, you feel even better.

Soon enough, you’ll really be in the middle of the semester. You’ll be drowning in midterms and laughing uncontrollably at yourself for being burnt out five weeks into the semester. I should take my own advice and really use this time to be proactive. I know where I stand in my academic career at this point, I know I’m done with it and instead of succumbing to it I should get on it and tackle everything due later this week. That way it will be done and out of the way.

But a new episode of “Jersey Shore” just came on TV and that is at least 30 times more interesting.

-Hayley Rafner is a journalism junior.