The apocalypse is here

by Christine Whitman, Senior Staff Writer

I have lived for almost two decades on a planet that, according to many, is disintegrating into a pile of nothing. Let’s face it, how many apocalyptic movies about the end of the world have we seen?

According to Wikipedia, yes I’m aware you’re not supposed to cite Wikipedia, there have been a total of 232 apocalyptic movies since the 1930s. The even crazier part is that 132 of those apocalyptic movies were made during my lifetime. C’mon Hollywood screenwriters, we obviously do not need another apocalyptic movie. I mean, I love “The Walking Dead” and the “Resident Evil” franchise as much as the next person, but please stop writing them. In all seriousness, what is our obsession with movies about the end of days, and why are there so many?

Well, I don’t know if anyone realizes it, but nothing in apocalyptic movies has ever happened. The Earth didn’t spontaneously combust at the end of 2012, as many believed was going to happen. I have never seen an alien or a zombie on my way to school. Although, just because I have yet to see an alien doesn’t mean they’re not real. The point is that they have not caused any destruction to Earth. Hollywood screenwriters are always able to formulate some new disease or creature that is going to terrorize Earth and cease life as we know it.

But wait, what if the thing to end life as we know it is already here? What if it’s an environmental issue like global warming? Plot twist, I know.

Now, I’m not an environmental activist. I don’t want you to donate money to Greenpeace, and I’m not part of the Environmental Protection Agency. I consider myself an average everyday citizen who it somewhat concerned about the environment. I mean, I recycle, attempt to take shorter showers — key word is attempt. But you don’t see me parading on the front steps of the U.S. Senate with a sign that says “End Global Warming Now.”

To clarify, global warming does not specifically refer to the warming of the Earth. Global warming refers to a general change in climate over a period of time. But that isn’t to say that global warming doesn’t exist. I know many people consistently argue that global warming doesn’t exist, but I have yet to find an legitimate argument to support this.

Global warming totally exists and here’s why. Has anyone been outside at all lately in San Diego? It’s March, and last week temperatures reached the high 80s, in our “rainy” season. It’s been so long since it’s rained in San Diego, I have actually forgotten what rain is. Now looking at a more global prospective, has anyone seen the videos of the polar ice caps melting? I’m no expert, but I don’t think that’s supposed to happen. You could just say, “Christine, I really don’t care that the polar ice caps are melting,” to which I shall respond, think about all the polar bears and penguins that are dying because they don’t have anywhere to live! If anything, care about the animals.

The point of this somewhat crazy rant is that our “apocalypse” is already here. Those Hollywood movies are created to distract us from the current problems Earth is facing, as in global warming. Our environmental apocalypse may not bring the end of days for hundreds of years, but there is no doubt in my mind that our environment is changing because of our consistent use of natural resources.

Someone tell Hollywood, I have their next screenplay.